Politically Correct in a Crazy World

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After much consideration,I have decided to make November a "Readers Request Month".

So if you can think of any stupid story/idea/suggestion/anything(!) that you want me to post,do tell me.I'll accept all kinds of request,but make sure the suggestion made is reasonable(for example,you don't request me to write story of a lesbian/gay,racist story blah blah blah).

After thinking of what you want me to post,do write your request on the tagboard/comment,or you can simply message me through handphone or tell me when we meet up one day in church or outside.Closing date will be 15th of November.If I didn't hear from any of you all,I may have to change it to "Army Month".I don't think you all want right?

By saying this it shows that my inspiration is getting worse.Oh dear...

Could this be a virus in disguise?How can my friend be sending an unknown file to me out of a sudden?The hacker must be smart to control his account,tricking us to accept the file.

Until now I didn't receive his reply.Conclusion: It must be a virus file.

"Hey,are you going to see Jackie Chan today?"said one of my colleagues to my officer.

Huh?Jackie Chan coming to Singapore.Are you kidding me?When I heard this,I thought he was referring to another person,maybe a codeword "Jackie Chan" to represent someone else.Somemore,I can't really trust their words most of the time.

So I purposely ask who is he.

"Huh?You don't know him?!"He replied.

Okay that's it.It was the real person himself.Get the camera ready,I mean,my camera phone ready.

My lunch finished just in time to catch the kung-fu star.According to my friend,he was here as an ambassador for children's cancer,so that is why he was wondering around the children ward.

There were many staff with their cameras on their hands ready to snap that Hong Kong actor.They were camping in a place just to wait for him to come out of somewhere.

When he came out,the people were flooding towards him.I was too slow to get to the front,thus the lousy photo taken.

He was walking to the children ward to visit the kids.My friends and I decided to camp outside waiting for another opportunity to snap another photo.

20 minutes has passed and I shall wait no longer,so I tell my friends and left the place.No point waiting for so long just to take his photo.

Anyway,we all are so idiot loh!Got work don't want to do go and chase star in hospital.But then hor,if Jay Chow were to come over here,I confirm will take 1/2 day urgent leave one.Hohohohoho.

No,there's nothing wrong with my spelling,it was done with a purpose.So stop complaining.

Sending complain letters is one of Singapore best weapons,and also one of the "leisure" for the people.The topic is:How can we write a complain letter worthy to publicize in Singapore?

In this topic,I'll show you(in my most crappiest way)on how you to write a complain letter.



1. Using innocents as a stake

In complain letters,the best way to have your letters read is to use the innocents as your content.Try using people such as children to make your whole complain letter stand out.By showing concern to the people makes you a kind and caring person instead of being self righteous.

Example:

I want to complain about the sexy lingerie scene that was shown on TV.One day when me and my family were watching our favorite local drama,there was this scene where the lead actress took off her towel revealing only her lingerie.My daughter was asking me who the actress was was,with me covering my face in shame.

I can't imagine this was shown on TV!How could they corrupt the minds of the little child.What will the children think?I know sexual education is necessary,but that was too early consider the age like them...blah blah blah...

Letter acknowledgment success rate: 85%

2. I,Me,Myself

Instead of using the innocent,you can be self righteous too!Try complaining especially when your when you're on an injury status,which adds a plus point to your letter.

Example:

My concern rise when I was injured by the big old tree that was planted beside the condominium.One day when I was jogging,the hugh tree branch fell off hitting my shoulder.I was taken to the hospital and was ward for a few days.If the brunch was to hit onto my head,I won't be here writing to you.

I was afraid that the tree will pose a danger threat to my family member.What if one day the whole tree fell off at my house(I lived on the 4th storey)?I think the authority should do something about it.

Letter acknowledgment success rate: 70%


3. Make your letter unique

By putting some interesting topic makes the whole thing worth debating.So trying squeezing your brain juice by writing something people never write before,and prepare yourself to be flamed.Topics like stand left on escalator is over,so quit using it.

Example:

The bumper sticker that was pasted on the back of the car can cause serious distraction to the drivers.There are provoking stickers such as vulgarities and quotes that may cause influences to the young ones and explicit pictures may cause traffic accident.

Government should ban bumper stickers blah blah blah...

Letter acknowledgment success rate: 60%


4. Never miss an opportunity to complain

Never lose a chance to complain about a thing so small.You should think it this way: Even small things around you can cause big problem.If you agree,please get your pen rolling.

*insert picture here,for this will add a plus point*

I was eating a bowl of bak chor mee and was astonished to find a small fish bone inside my noodle.I can't imagine me having to swallowing it in.I hope the authority can do something to get rid of this dangerous stall.

Letter acknowledgment success rate: 66%


5. Knowing what's the hottest topic

In order to get the editor to read your letter,you must write a topic that was somewhat hottest topic in Singapore.Topics like CPF,GST,price increase may bring even more debates from the reader.

Example:

What was the flour price increase?How can a small peasants survive in a situations like this?

During the 80s,the price bread was that cheap and now,blah blah blah...

Letter acknowledgment success rate: 90%


This was just my 2 cents worth,don't say I didn't warn you.

Sometimes I think that I have a very short life.

If a life expectancy of a man is 80 years old,than my life expectancy will be:


Normal man : 80 years

Get sick easily such as flu,fever,cough : -2 years

Irregular exercise : -1 year

Eat alot of oily food such as 1 big bag of potato chips all by yourself : -2 years

Think too much,worry too much : -2 years

High salt intake : -2 years

Staring too much at the screen : -1 year

Single and unmarried ko lian tai : -2 year

Inconsistent sleeping/eating habit : -3 years

Work too much : -2 years

Siao too much : -1 year

Age that you will die : 62 years

You are : 24 years old

Years left : 38 years

Okay lah,38 years should be enough for me to suffer here lah.

After watching so many Youtube music videos,it's time for me to share with all of you some of the videos I like so far.

I'll go for the top 5 songs I like in Youtube.For those who appreciates group band who jam guitars and drum like no tomorrow,sorry to disappoint you.I prefer peaceful,yet upbeat songs.

Okay,here goes:




Number 5:






Rendition of Kings of Convenience's "I Rather Dance With You".Love the plucking part from the left guitarist.If not for anti-climax phone ring ending(3:31),the whole song will have a nicer ending.

Why the top 5?Figuring of chords and tabs by themselves.I like.


Number 4:



很多鹅 by 旺福乐团.The song may sound childish for all of you,but to me it's very cute.One of the entertaining band I've seen so far,even though their song is very simple.

Why the top 5?The guitarist's solid plucking,plus the cute...ermmm...song.Yeah,song.

Okay lah,you all people like shredding is it?!

Number 3:



Rendition of The Beatles' "Michelle".To those of you who do not know,"Michelle" is another one of my favorite songs from Beatles other than "Hey Jude" and "Yesterday".Well,please ignore the French word,he made a slight mistake on the words.Other than that,it's okay.

Why the top 5?The solo part at the ending.Slow and steady.Brilliant!


Number 2:



"Energy Flow" by Ryuichi Sakamoto.The whole song sounded touching,but it do makes me feel better after hearing it.Came upon this after browsing at one of the local forums.

Why the top 5?Piano variation and the touchy beginning.


Number 1:



"Smile" by Lois Mahalia and Carl Herrgesell.I happened to chance upon this in youtube,without knowing what song is this.After listening to it,I feel the wow but the powerful vocal by the lady.Usually I don't really like listening to jazz because it's the song that makes me feel sleepy,but this song just blew my mind.I wonder if this song was composed by one of them?

For the whole video,I was somehow concentrated to look at the guy's reaction when he played the piano.I don't know,but he looks like he's feeling high.Oh man,is there something wrong with me?

Why the top 5?B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L(I took 10 second typing this,without using CAP lock)song,outstanding support by the pianist for the singer.

There are so many nice song to put up,but I seems to have a poor memory when comes to all this.I should have put some of it inside my favorite list.

For Raymond's birthday celebration,we had a Japanese Buffet at Kuishin Bo in Suntec City.

The birthday dinner was kinda rushed,because Raymond was very unlucky to get activated by the SAF and he had to be at his camp for quite some time.When we managed to meet up,we had to queue up to get our seats.

We heard from the waitress that we had to wait for almost 1 hour.We wanted to give up waiting but after thinking of how delicious the food will be,we decided to stick to our plan.

Thank God the queue was not actually THAT slow.We got our seats within the next half an hour.Make sure the food is worth our wait!



Once we got our seat,Glenn,Raymond and I proceed to take the food while Elvin secures the table.After 10 minutes the table is full of food,and according to Elvin,the people around is amazed by how typical kiasu Singaporean we are.Don't blame us lah,since this is our first time here,our primary focus is to try out as many dishes as possible.

Kaminabe(Pronounce as ka-mi-na-bey,which means paper pot/steamboat).Please don't be offended by na-bey,I mean no harm.Anyway,the soup base is super nice!I wonder how can the paper withstand the bubbling hot soup?










Desserts...at that point of time my stomach is complaining not to take the food.But,what the heck!



After the meal,Elvin vomited some of the input because the food was over his limit.You didn't expect me to take his puke material,do you?

I kinda like the food very much,especially when they give out some promotion.When you here the announcement on the PA,rush to the counter immediately as they'll be giving out "rare" food like frozen strawberry and horseshoe crab.It's limited to first 20-30 customers so do hurry.

The price of the buffet is relatively high,it's about $45 per person when you eat in one of the weekends.Going for a buffet lunch in weekday is definitely cheaper.

Oh,one more thing.If you want to go there for buffet,do make reservation.Don't be like us wasting 30 minutes of our time not having our food.




Our plan to surprise Raymond almost failed.We were surprised that Raymond didn't ask us about his birthday gift.Eventually we came out with plan B,where Glenn "volunteered" to send Raymond and Elvin to a nearest bus stop.

When we went to his car,Glenn purposefully took out Raymond's present,pretending that he didn't know anything,and passed it to me.I then passed it to Elvin and lastly Elvin to Raymond.

......

Alright my description is kinda catch-no-ball,but you agar-agar get the idea right?

Whatever it is,Raymond got himself a present with a Converse plastic bag.He thought that we bought for him Converse,but it turns out to be...




















To be continued...Awww......just joking.














An Adidas sport shoes!I like the orange color,that explains why the brown-orange crumpler we bought for Glenn.


Alright,with the new shoes,running shouldn't be a problem for Raymond.

The next coming outing for the A2: Christmas BBQ!

Yesterday's ex-choir presentation turns out to be quite a smooth one,despite the fact that I didn't came for the 1st 2 weeks of practice.Thank God the song was not in parts,or else I'll be having difficulty singing it.

This is my second time going for the presentation,this time with even more people,which makes me a less nervous presenter.Since I didn't practice much,I tend to forget some of the lyrics.Well,as long as there's a lyrics well placed on the standing tray,singing wouldn't be a problem.

After the worship song,it's out turn to do our presentation.When we went up the stage,I saw nothing on the tray.

Oh shit.

I'm gonna butchered the song!Nevermind,Calm Down Wei Liang.You can do it.

After the song,you may see me going for a cool exit,but that was me thinking of how to strangle the person who lost the lyrics.

Anyway,this is the end of my second presentation.I would say the 1st group of presentation by Sylvy,Jing Yi and Eddie was good.The song was like those kind of lounge-y,rainy day song and the 2 girls blend in well.Well,how you all consider doing another presentation again?

For my 3rd presentation,I wanted to come out with my own lyrics.Let's hope I know how to figure out the chords.

After being so emo during the death and funeral of my grandmother,it's time that I should move on with life.

Enough of tears flowing from my eyes when thinking of her during my sleep,enough of regretful thoughts,enough of whys and more whys.Enough!...for now.

To those who came for my grandmother's funeral last week,thanks for all your support.To most of them who left a comment about my big family,thank you.My grandmother will be happy if she hears that.

I never know when will be the next time I will feel emo about this thing again,but I believe time(and God) will heal your pain.

Be strong!

Last time I did mention to Jing Yi that I wanted to do this crappy post about this,that was like 1 month ago.Well,no offense to the chio bus,I mean no harm and I do love you all deep deep from the bottom of my heart.

So back to the topic of Why Chio Bu Cannot Work In Factories?


Is it because it will ruined their beautiful face?


Nope.That can be rectified by their make-up tool kit.No worries.


Is it because they can't perform?


Who say chio bu is nothing but display items?Never forget:"anything you can do,I can do better."


Or is it because they're just bimbos?


Chio Bu have brains,mind you.Jessica Simpson,according to my dear brother Ong Ming Keat,has a high IQ than most of us.


So what is it that they're not allowed to work.


That will be because they might distract the workers.Imagine when the worker is busy trying to do some work in a highly acidic chemical,suddenly a chio bu walk past him.He will be turning his head to look at her,simply ignoring what he's going to do next.

Then he will be following her without realizing that he's going to an acid pool.By the time he realized it he'll be falling inside the pit and nobody knows.

The next day they'll be searching high and low for him,thinking that he has gone missing.Perhaps when they cleared the acid pool during their machine maintenance,they'll find bone remaining or nothing at all.

!!!!!!!

Scary isn't it?But that was just my crappy imagination.